Please Grade My Essay

[avr]

Can one of you please evaluate my essay and give me a grade in 0-6 scale. I have GMAT scheduled in 2 weeks and don't want to do badly early in the exam. If you read the essay, pls give me some feedback.

Topic :

"Seniority (years of service) should not be the basis of employee compensation. Employees should be promoted and given raises solely on the basis of their work performance and merit. That is a better way to encourage high productivity."

Discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the opinion stated above. Support your views with reasons and/or examples from your own experience, observations or reading.

Essay :

Some people argue that seniority should be the basis for promotions and career advancement. On the otherhand, we can also argue that promotions and additional responsibilities should be given purely based on the performance and competence of an employee. I believe that performance and competence should be the only criteria in determining promotion and career advancement oppurtunity.

First, we should promote employees based on competence and performance because that will motivate the high performing employees to do even better. Also, this will help the company to retain key emplyees. If the company is not rewarding it's high performers, then it will risk loosing those employee to a compititor. Moreover, employee will not have any incentive to stretch his/her ability. An employee will think he will get promoted only when he become senior enough for the next level.

Second, if employees are promoted based on seniority then it will lead to mismanagement and unrest in the company. Imagine an unqualified candidate becoming a CEO based on seniority and take the company down. It is not good either to his/her career or to the lives of thousands of employees and shareholders.

Third, by promoting employees based on seniority and promoting inefficiency the companies will loose its compititive edge. This will allow a compititor to take advantage and gain market share and business away from the company.

In summary, even though I respect senior employees in a company, promotion and advancement oppurtunities should be given to based on performance and competence. This will buiild an efficient organization, motivate employees and promote compititiveness in employees.

[StaceyKoprince]

Hi, thanks for posting your essays! Just an FYI that instructors don't respond to posted essays - we just have too much to do with all of the question posted and essays tend to be the thing that is least "transferable" (that is, you can learn a lot, but probably other people won't learn as much from looking at our responses to your essays, unlike the multiple choice questions).

But I certainly hope other community members respond. Also, if you're in our class, you'll have an opportunity to get essays graded and get written feedback during the course (after class 6). We also offer an essay grading service - 2 essays graded and given written feedback. If you'd like to do this, send an email to studentservices@manhattangmat.com.